The Crimescene: 9:13 pm
Victim 1: Unidentified Chocolate Chip Cookie A
Victim 2: Unidentified Chocolate Chip Cookie B
Description: Two Chocolate Chip Cookies, barely out of the oven, found badly mutilated on cookie sheet.
Note: Also several scattered unidentifiable cookie parts - perhaps more victims?
The neighbouring cookie, who coincidentally was not damaged at all? Looks like he's pretty nervous, sweating like that...
"It wasn't me! I swear!"
The cookie's jealous unbaked cousins?
"We've never even been on that cookie tray!"
"Hey, I was just doing my job!"
Ruling: Accidental death. Spatula charged with abetting manslaughter.
Notes: When recipe says "let cool on sheet", they probably mean for longer than five seconds.